Fall is peak wedding season, and if all those declarations of “I do” have you thinking about popping the question, why not choose a compassionate, planet-friendly way to do so? A proposal is the first line in a story of shared dreams and an opportunity to lay a foundation for a relationship built on kindness. There are endless ways to celebrate humanely, like by tossing native flower seeds or incorporating vegan treats. After all, compassion endures—just like your love.
The antiquated idea of releasing doves, butterflies or balloons during a proposal harms animals and the environment. Birds used as living confetti are often white homing pigeons rather than doves, but either way, they frequently fall victim to predators, become disoriented and lost, starve to death or succumb to extreme weather conditions. Sending vulnerable animals to their deaths is no way to celebrate love.
Speaking of death, don’t propose with butterfly corpses. Butterflies sold for releases are stuffed into envelopes or tiny packages and shipped over long distances. These fragile insects often don’t survive the grueling trip. And as for balloons, they and their strings can end up in lakes, oceans, fields and forests, where they pose a deadly threat to animals who become entangled in or consume them.
Instead of using animals as props, consider how nature might lend magic to your special moment. Imagine proposing in a garden filled with pollinator-friendly flowers. Or perhaps pop the question during a hike as the leaves change, surrounded by the beautiful sights and sounds of the forest. You’ll save time and money on decorations. You might even spot an animal in their natural habitat.
And there’s nothing romantic about proposing in a horse-drawn carriage. Horses forced to pull carriages endure exhausting labor in all weather conditions, breathing in exhaust fumes from traffic and walking on hard pavement, which leads to respiratory issues and leg problems. Plus, they can become startled by loud traffic, causing accidents that can injure or kill both them and humans. Instead, why not propose while you and your beloved plant a tree together in a meaningful location? You would make a positive contribution to the environment.
You can offer cheers to many happy years over a vegan meal. A recent study from Stanford University, published in BMC Medicine, shows that going vegan might effectively reduce one’s biological age. This comes as no surprise, since scientists have long connected animal-derived foods and ingredients to various diseases, with the World Health Organization labeling red and processed flesh as carcinogenic. On the other hand, a study on 22 pairs of identical twins found that going vegan significantly improved their cardiovascular health in just eight weeks.
Proposing over steak or another meaty meal is a huge mistake. A study in Nutrients found that fatty meats have high levels of methionine, an amino acid that breaks down into smelly gas, which can cause bloating. And think of what animals had to go through to become a slab of flesh on your plate. After miserable months on a crowded feedlot or in a cage, animals raised to be eaten are hauled without food or water to a slaughterhouse, where workers slit their throats—sometimes, while they’re still conscious. Choosing to eat vegan shows that your compassion extends to all sentient beings. It’s a small decision that makes a big statement.
If you’re planning a post-proposal party with family and friends, make it a vegan celebration to reflect your commitment to compassion. Choose eco-friendly decorations, like dried rose petals, and avoid disposable tableware. You might also include animal-friendly party favors, such as donations to animal advocacy groups in guests’ names or small gifts from brands that are cruelty-free and vegan.
Making good choices matters. So let your proposal reflect the love and compassion you and your partner share—not just for each other but for the planet and all its inhabitants. Your love story deserves nothing less.
